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Sunday, May 13, 2012

What Makes You Terrible


I am officially sick of hearing the obsessively crazed One Direction fangirls.
So sick in fact, I have decided that I hate the band. Ok, I can't hate people I've never met. I'll just dislike their songs. Not to mention, their songs really aren't that special...to me, at least.

And I'm so annoyed at hearing the band that I'm posting this. See, there's only so many "na-na-na's" that I can take. Honestly, didn't young, poppy boy-bands die out...hm, ten years ago? Why the need to bring them back? I think they should've stayed in their grave.

But unfortunately, they didn't. Recently, I came upon this hilarious parody of One Direction. Words cannot describe how hilarious it is...But the sad part is; certain parts of it can be qualified as true.

Now, everyone knows you can't critique someone/ something without seeing all they have to offer. But I have officially scarred my eyes when I came upon their video for "What Makes You Beautiful." So this is for you, One Direction.

What Makes You [One Direction] Terrible:

1. It is as if the devil came and put five Justin Bieber's into one band. Must voices go that high?

2. The lyrics to their songs are definitely appealing to one demographic only: squealing teen-girls. Make some real music.

3. The tune to their one smash hit, "What Makes You Beautiful" is nothing special. It has repetition, easily sung notes, and comes nothing close to singers who have talented voices and soulful songs. I'll admit, it has the craved catchiness, and the tune isn't bad.

4. Because of the extremely narrowed down demographic, schools across the world are forced to listen to crazy fan-girls rant about strangers whom they've never met. Obsessions have become popular, it seems.

5. The first time I heard it, I was insulted. Not all teenagers are insecure, wear make-up, and smile at the ground. I'm sure it wasn't meant to come across like this, but that was my first impression. First impressions count.

Must I even continue? I am honestly sick of the squealing, and ranting, and raving, and obsessing. It's time all girls grow up and listen to themselves.

My first reaction to One Direction was simple. After hearing some of my friends mention that "There are five of them, right?" I jumped in saying, "No, there are four. North, South, East, and West."

I got blank looks in return.

Nevertheless, I soon learned to loathe the band as murmurs of "pretty hair," "cute eyes," and many more comments filled the halls.

While One Direction sings to girls all over the world about what makes those girls beautiful; I'll be humming to my own tune: What Makes You, One Direction--fine, fine, their songs, Terrible.

~Banana Win

P.S. Enjoy!

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